A friend and fellow writer, Kymberly Dakin, teaches a Creative Non-Fiction class near her home in Maine. She then shared one of her prompts with our Purple Space Writing group. The Prompt: Choose an object that has meaning for you. Write about why you chose it, the history, ETC. Then, write from the Object’s point of view: how do they feel about you? What is the object’s history?
I’m not sure when Kym Dakin offered up the prompt about a meaningful object that my mind went immediately to my youth and my lovey, Fifi. Man, Fifi conjures up so many distant memories - and a toy (lovey) I couldn’t live without for almost two decades.
Fifi was my first love, a little stuffed animal doggie that my Aunt Mary gave me when I was a toddler (probably two or three years old). I was immediately captivated by this small stuffed pup and carried Fifi around like Linus and his blanket from Charlie Brown and his gang fame for years. Several times, my dad had to drive back and forth from the East Side of Cleveland to our home on the near West side of Cleveland when I either left Fifi at home or one of my aunts. He was never thrilled with that scenario!
If my recesses of memory serve me right, I first saw Fifi in a window of a large downtown Cleveland, Ohio, department store called Higbee’s and wanted it…badly. I was shopping there with Aunt Mary and my other Aunt Lottie at Christmastime. There was no mistake to my aunts that I needed that dog! I still see the faint display of toys in the large street-level windows with little Fifi curled up on a rocking chair on a doll’s lap.
The allure of a “lovey”—whether it’s a stuffed animal, blankie, or other soft object—comes down to comfort, security, and emotional well-being. I think that for a young child carrying around a lovey, these objects serve as transitional items that help bridge the gap between dependence on their parents and growing independence. Fif certainly helped me to achieve that gap! Teddy Bears were the big thing (and still are) in my youth during the early 1960s, and though I loved them too, my heart was right when I carried my Fifi dog anywhere my folks let me, but I needed it mostly at bedtime.
But not every kid has a lovey or needs one. Speaking from my experience as a child with one, and then as a mom to two children, only one had a lovey. When he was about a year old, my son, Ryan, “selected” his lovey, Boo-Boo Bunny (from the book Good Night Moon). My daughter, Oliva, never needed one.
Ryan’s Boo-Boo Bunny and my Fifi were filled with secrets, tears, and snot. Our lovies got us through some rough patches in our early years, though 30 years apart.
Boo-Boo Bunny and Ryan were inseparable, and for good reason, as he battled three out of five cancers from ages 2-10 with Bunny at his side every single step of the way to recovery and beyond. Besides video games, Boo-Boo Bunny had to carry the days and nights for Ryan to feel as safe as he could be.
Here is why lovies are so meaningful:
Security & Comfort – A lovey provides a sense of familiarity and stability, especially in new or stressful situations, like bedtime, daycare, doctor visits, And living in a hospital!
Emotional Help – Holding, stroking, or cuddling a lovey can help children calm themselves when anxious, scared, or overwhelmed. Yes!
Sense of Ownership & Control – Kids don’t have much control over their lives, but a lovey is theirs—they can carry it, hug it, and make decisions about it.
Scent & Texture Association – Lovies absorb familiar scents (like home or a parent), which can be incredibly soothing. The soft texture is also reassuring to little hands.
A lovey is more than just an object; it’s a source of warmth, reassurance, and love. Even as kids outgrow them, I’m a big kid at 63 who has tucked Fifi away, along with Ryan’s tattered Bunny; they are a full reminder of childhood security. I’m feeling all fuzzy inside as I write this story. There is a warmth in my soul I cannot explain in writing about this meaningful object. One would think I would write about my sewing machines, running shoes, fabric stash, or car. However, when I first read the prompt, I immediately thought of Fifi; who knew?
If you’ve carried a lovey around, maybe you know what I speak.
Did you have a lovey growing up, or know a little one who’s particularly attached to one?
I’m wondering if my now 10-month-old grandson, Big Baby Bodacious Bodie, will select a lovey (he’s got a stuffed animal zoo to choose from!)
Fifi has seen better days and has lost two eyes and a nose. I noticed a few tears on the back that I plan to sew back together, but the bells in both ears ring their sweet sound when I shake my lovey, Fifi.
It's the little things...
TBC - Part 2 tomorrow
bSoleille!
Terri
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